Pick of the week
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Here's my pick of last weeks best quirky stories and pictures.
Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely jotted down on the back of that talent agency's card.
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Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!
This weeks stories & pics
Courtney Stodden unwrapped to wrap her Christmas presents (egotastic.com).
She'll give ol' Santa, or any other old men she chooses to date, a heart attack!
Bar Refaeli wants you to buy her Under-me's for Christmas! (egotastic.com).
"… Lindsay Lohan is not for hire, despite recent claims from a talent agency sending mass emails offering her services for Bar Mitzvahs."
I'm sure there's a foreskin joke in there somewhere.
Olivia Culpo was crowned Donald Trump's Miss Universe (uk.lifestyle.yahoo.com).
You should have seen the entry from Alpha Centauri though—those breasts would have poked your eyes out, all three of them! You can take a peek at the 2012 (Milky Way) contestants here (him.uk.msn.com).
You can catch more of Candice's "raw sexual energy" charms in this recent Victoria's Secret photoshoot (hotcelebshome.com).
Pic 15. ♥
Curvy Kim Kardashian took her ass to the gym in some see-thru leggings (dailymail.co.uk).
And some Kimbo cleavage to boot (hotcelebshome.com).
X Factor's nawty Britney Spears tribute Lorna Bliss cleared by Ofcom (digitalspy.co.uk).
"The regulator said that the dance by Lorna Bliss, who had previously auditioned for Britain's Got Talent, was 'saucy' rather than 'overtly erotic or sexualised'."
If you didn't catch it, Britney Spears impersonator Lorna's performance starts at 2:06, but you may just want to start it at 1:16.
Catch Lorna's even more risqué "Toxic" audition on Britain's Got Talent (YouTube.com).
Olympian Suzy Favor-Hamilton exposed as $600-an-hour escort! (uk.eurosport.yahoo.com) …
Which did her no favours with Disney (radaronline.com).
"'So proud to be working with Disney this year :) Looking forward to the Disneyland Half-Marathon & Expo this weekend!!!' she wrote on her official Facebook page before last summer's event in August."
I heard old Mr. Magoo was seen getting off a Greyhound in Vegas and that someone had introduced him to Twitter. One wonders where The Smoking Gun got its tip?
.:: Top column 2 ::.
Paz De La Huerta got naked for Playboy (dailymail.co.uk).
You can catch the spread here (adultsmagazines.blogspot.co.uk).
Amanda Seyfried deep-throated popsicles for Lovelace biopic (gossipcop.com).
Miley Cyrus grabbed some dang ol' stripper booty for her birthday (thesuperficial.com).
Obviously I support watermarking and tagging of images, but there's watermarking and tagging and there's really obtrusive watermarking and tagging! You can grab an untagged version of the pic here (imagetwist.com) but just remember to write TMZ somewhere less spoiling than right over the strippers ass!
Joanna Krupa gave some ass'tastic bikini candids in Miami (hawtcelebs.com).
Scarlett Johansson hacker got 10 years (celebrity.uk.msn.com).
"The biggest spectacle in the case was the revelation that nude photos taken by [Scarlett] Johansson herself and meant for her then-husband Ryan Reynolds were placed on the internet."
Arts, tech. & funnies
Will Cotton, Tracey Emin, and Cindy Sherman create nude Playboy centrefolds (independent.co.uk).
"Emin, the one-time controversial leading member of the Young British Artists movement and now Royal Academy member and national treasure, contributed Lonely Chair Drawing V."
That'll give you wood—or splinters at least.
As always, revolution revolves exactly back to what it deposed. Didn't we all cheer.
"At trial, Knight [the married male dentist] testified he had complained to Nelson [his too-sexy female assistant] on several occasions that her clothing was too tight, revealing and 'distracting.'"
"But sometime in 2009, he also began exchanging text messages with Nelson. Most of these were work-related and harmless, according to testimony. But others were more suggestive, including one in which Knight asked Nelson how often she had an orgasm. She never answered the text."
Wait a minute, I must be missing something here. Either that or that Iowa court never left the 50s. How dare she dress in that figure-hugging dental assistant uniform and not tell him if she diddled that night!
"As twins we're definitely at an advantage as a tag team. Wrestling is something we love to do—and it's even better that we can do it together."
Quit saying you'll volunteer for a monkey flip!
George Lucas originally wanted Star Wars FOUR trilogies! (blastr.com).
"… with Disney taking over Lucasfilm, Star Wars Episode VII gearing up for production, and the Mouse House very interested in making as many Star Wars movies as possible—we might end up getting the original dozen films that Lucas first envisioned nearly 40 years ago."
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