Pick of the week
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Here's my pick of last weeks best quirky stories and pictures.
Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely going to be filtered by default in the UK. And so they should!
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This weeks stories & pics
Here's the pics in HQ (celebrityoopsdigest
"… those doors were wide open and her backwards glance in the last few pictures after bending over suggest she was a giving a display of playful exhibitionism."
Pic 5. ♥
Stephanie Seymour's nipple slipped out her swimsuit in St. Bart's (egotastic.com).
You can catch those pics in HQ here (hotcelebshome.com).
Britney Spears facing the axe for being "too boring" for X Factor USA? (uk.omg.yahoo.com).
"It's reported that Simon Cowell wanted 'crazy Britney, but he got boring Britney.'"
In other words he wanted her to piss herself in her chair or something. But quick to move on …
"But before you begin to ponder what exactly it is that Kate Moss knows about music, Simon has his eye on her as a stylist for the show."
If his libido gets hooked on Caroline Wozniacki he'll bring her in to bounce his balls and play a few sets. Sod the singing!
Nicki Minaj's tits nearly fell out … (dailymail.co.uk).
Said defender of the nation, the Dailymail with a lot of wishful thinking. "Dissssgusting! It ought not be allowed! Take a look a look at the pictures."
After the mail blew it's load, Nicki didn't quite manage a wardrobe malfunction, but here's the pics in HQ (celebrityoopsdigest.blogspot.co.uk).
Hayden Panettiere is a bikini babe in January's Esquire (hotcelebshome.com).
A mere bra cannot restrain Kim Kardashian's nipples! (celebrityoopsdigest.blogspot.co.uk).
Kate Upton braved Antarctica for a bikini photoshoot for Sports Illustrated (dailymail.co.uk).
You can catch the pics in HQ here (hotcelebshome.com).
Ashlee Simpson gave some bikini joy in Hawaii (hotcelebshome.com).
With the Simpson clan holidaying in Hawaii and everyone looking at Ashlee's bikini bits, and breaking news that Kanye has stiched a designer baby in Kim, Jessica Simpson thought she best smoother back some attention with a bathroom tweet of her own again pregnant belly (youtube.com, thesuperficial.com).
Having only announce her pregnancy a month ago, Jessica confirms some women carry small, some women carry big, and Jessica Simpson carries huge. But Jessica's all right with that, tweeting "Bumpin' and proud!"
If celebrity baby bumps float it for you, you can catch a larger piccie of Jessica's huge baby bump on her Twitter.
.:: Top column 2 ::.
Candice Swanepoel gave a Victoria's Secret lingerie photoshoot (hotcelebshome.com).
Arts, tech. & funnies
JAV porn star Uta Kohaku wants you to send her a … gift (capitalbay.com).
"Uta Kohaku, a Japanese porn actress, is promoting her upcoming film, 'Semen Collection 2,' by asking her army of Twitter fans to send bottles of their own bodily fluid."
Quitting Instagram, Facebook, etc. over these periodical scares is the Internet-adult equivelent of running away from home ….
"In admitting [he admires the skilled art of the past] and revealing his total failure by such standards—he makes it seem as if the whole edifice of conceptually lubricated contemporary art is as brittle and fake as he has turned out to be."
Ouch! However, Jonathan managed to find a place for Damien's "Away From The Flock" in his favourite artworks back in the spring, and his disillusionment seems to have keenly timed with a general backlash against money-grabbing contemporary conceptual art.
"Hirst's ideas seemed to me once to possess an intellectual and emotional beauty—and their own physical beauty, too. Now everything he does is ugly, ugly, ugly, and it adds to the world's already copious stores of junk." —Jones on Damien Hirst (slowmuse.com).
Those damn Emperor's fooling you with their new clothes!
Vote to keep Piers Morgan in the US (news.uk.msn.com).
"Americans should keep Piers Morgan because he is doing 'so much good' in the US, according to a new British online petition."
That's not the real reason. We finally got rid of him and we just don't want him back!
Inventor warns of danger of "Google generation" (telegraph.co.uk).
"Trevor Bayliss, the inventor of the wind-up radio, has warned the internet is dumbing down children."
Mr Bayliss fears the "Google Generation of youngsters who will be incapable of making anything with their hands". I don't think it is the internet doing that.
But if it is making Generation G "incapable of making anything with their hands" it's because they have them busy with something else, leading us on to …
Campaigners seeking tighter controls on internet porn saw their bill rejected last week, but a whipping of scare tactics public fury by The Daily Mail got it passed.
"A headline in the same newspaper earlier this week trumpeted a study allegedly showing that online porn 'can make you lose your memory.'"
That must be why I link to its entertainment section so much with all its "Dissssgusting! She's got her tits out!" headlines above the pictures. I forget the danger!
Conservative Member of Parliament Claire Perry, who was pushing the proposal that was rejected, will now take charge of making sure the system gets implemented, and will be holding an "erect your morals" committee coffee morning meet at her home every Wednesday.
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