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Pick of the week

Pick of the week

31st December 2012

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Here's my pick of last weeks best quirky stories and pictures.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely going to be filtered by default in the UK. And so they should!

No responsibility is taken for the content of any external websites to which links may lead. All links are verified safe with McAfee Site Advisor when posted.

This weeks stories & pics

Britney Spears "Oops, I did it again!"
Britney Spears is getting axed from X Factor because Simon Cowell wanted crazy, pissing-in-her-chair Britney, not boring Britney.
Rihanna caught changing in Barbados

Boxing Day gave a naked Rihanna caught changing bikini in Barbados, and what a candid ass'tastic treat it was! (

Here's the pics in HQ (celebrityoopsdigest

"… those doors were wide open and her backwards glance in the last few pictures after bending over suggest she was a giving a display of playful exhibitionism."

Pic 5. ♥

Stephanie Seymour nipple slip

Stephanie Seymour's nipple slipped out her swimsuit in St. Bart's (

Pick of the week: illustrated sexy celebrity entertainment and quirky stories
Jennifer Lopez football hotness

Jennifer Lopez's football hotness reminds us how bad we want to violate her tailgate (

You can catch those pics in HQ here (

Ashley Tisdale Instagram hotness

Ashley Tisdale posted some Instagram beach hotness.

1 | 2 (
Britney Spears axed from X Factor?

Britney Spears facing the axe for being "too boring" for X Factor USA? (

"It's reported that Simon Cowell wanted 'crazy Britney, but he got boring Britney.'"

In other words he wanted her to piss herself in her chair or something. But quick to move on …

Simon Cowell eying up Kate Moss for blowjob the next series?

"But before you begin to ponder what exactly it is that Kate Moss knows about music, Simon has his eye on her as a stylist for the show."

If his libido gets hooked on Caroline Wozniacki he'll bring her in to bounce his balls and play a few sets. Sod the singing!

Related stories:

Nicki Minaj Christmas Extravaganza

Nicki Minaj's tits nearly fell out … (

Said defender of the nation, the Dailymail with a lot of wishful thinking. "Dissssgusting! It ought not be allowed! Take a look a look at the pictures."

After the mail blew it's load, Nicki didn't quite manage a wardrobe malfunction, but here's the pics in HQ (

Hayden Panettiere in Esquire

Hayden Panettiere is a bikini babe in January's Esquire (

Kim Kardashian pokies

A mere bra cannot restrain Kim Kardashian's nipples! (

Bar Refaeli Passionata Lingerie

Bar Refaeli got pin-up for Passionata Lingerie Spring/Summer 2013 collection (

Kate Upton Antarctic photoshoot

Kate Upton braved Antarctica for a bikini photoshoot for Sports Illustrated (

You can catch the pics in HQ here (

Recent/related stories:

Kate Upton got topless for Vogue Germany (Pick of the Week, 10th December).
Ashlee Simpson bikini candids in Hawaii

Ashlee Simpson gave some bikini joy in Hawaii (

With the Simpson clan holidaying in Hawaii and everyone looking at Ashlee's bikini bits, and breaking news that Kanye has stiched a designer baby in Kim, Jessica Simpson thought she best smoother back some attention with a bathroom tweet of her own again pregnant belly (,

Having only announce her pregnancy a month ago, Jessica confirms some women carry small, some women carry big, and Jessica Simpson carries huge. But Jessica's all right with that, tweeting "Bumpin' and proud!"

Jessica Simpson: "Bumpin' and proud!"

If celebrity baby bumps float it for you, you can catch a larger piccie of Jessica's huge baby bump on her Twitter.

Related story:

Updated 5th January 2013.
Kanye has stiched a designer baby in Kim link changed.

.:: Top column 2 ::.
Candice Swanepoel Victoria's Secret lingerie photoshoot

Candice Swanepoel gave a Victoria's Secret lingerie photoshoot (

Arts, tech. & funnies

Uta Kohaku wants you to send her a gift

JAV porn star Uta Kohaku wants you to send her a … gift (

"Uta Kohaku, a Japanese porn actress, is promoting her upcoming film, 'Semen Collection 2,' by asking her army of Twitter fans to send bottles of their own bodily fluid."
Quiting Facebook is …

The flap over its revised terms of service is said to have lost Instagram millions of users—but did it? (

Quitting Instagram, Facebook, etc. over these periodical scares is the Internet-adult equivelent of running away from home ….

Damien Hirst

The Guardian art critic Jonathan Jones continues his new-found loathing of contemporary art with a tirade on Damien Hirst. (

"In admitting [he admires the skilled art of the past] and revealing his total failure by such standards—he makes it seem as if the whole edifice of conceptually lubricated contemporary art is as brittle and fake as he has turned out to be."

Ouch! However, Jonathan managed to find a place for Damien's "Away From The Flock" in his favourite artworks back in the spring, and his disillusionment seems to have keenly timed with a general backlash against money-grabbing contemporary conceptual art.

"Hirst's ideas seemed to me once to possess an intellectual and emotional beauty—and their own physical beauty, too. Now everything he does is ugly, ugly, ugly, and it adds to the world's already copious stores of junk." —Jones on Damien Hirst (

Those damn Emperor's fooling you with their new clothes!

Related stories:

Piers Morgan

Vote to keep Piers Morgan in the US (

"Americans should keep Piers Morgan because he is doing 'so much good' in the US, according to a new British online petition."

That's not the real reason. We finally got rid of him and we just don't want him back!

Related stories:

Piers Morgan bans Madonna worldwide (Pick of the Week, 1st April).
Piers Morgan calls Kate Moss "horrific" (Pick of the Week, 17th March).
Trevor Bayliss warns the internet is dumbing down children

Inventor warns of danger of "Google generation" (

"Trevor Bayliss, the inventor of the wind-up radio, has warned the internet is dumbing down children."

Mr Bayliss fears the "Google Generation of youngsters who will be incapable of making anything with their hands". I don't think it is the internet doing that.

But if it is making Generation G "incapable of making anything with their hands" it's because they have them busy with something else, leading us on to …

UK Govenment automatic net porn filter accepted

Rejected last week, online porn will be filtered by default in UK after The Daily Mail raised a hue and cry (

Campaigners seeking tighter controls on internet porn saw their bill rejected last week, but a whipping of scare tactics public fury by The Daily Mail got it passed.

"A headline in the same newspaper earlier this week trumpeted a study allegedly showing that online porn 'can make you lose your memory.'"

That must be why I link to its entertainment section so much with all its "Dissssgusting! She's got her tits out!" headlines above the pictures. I forget the danger!

Conservative Member of Parliament Claire Perry, who was pushing the proposal that was rejected, will now take charge of making sure the system gets implemented, and will be holding an "erect your morals" committee coffee morning meet at her home every Wednesday.

Related story:

UK Govenment rejects automatic net porn filter (Pick of the Week, 17th December).

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Tags: Ashlee Simpson, Ashley Tisdale, Bar Refaeli, Britney Spears, Candice Swanepoel, Hayden Panettiere, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Simpson, Kate Upton, Kim Kardashian, Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, Stephanie Seymour, Uta Kohaku.


Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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