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Pick of the week

Pick of the week

12th February 2013

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Here's my grab-bag pick of last weeks best celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment sexiness, & just plain quirky stories and pictures. A weekly round-up for busy pervs! There's pictures—reading optional.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely won't get a Valentine's card from anyone mentioned herein.

No responsibility is taken for the content of any external websites to which links may lead. All links are verified safe with McAfee Site Advisor when posted.

This weeks stories & pics

XXXtina—Love Your Body
Extravagant marital pad may be proving hard to shift, but XXXtina is still taking a squirt at loving your body!
Updated 14th February.
Beyonce, Super Bowl 2013

Beyoncé made up for her inauguration lip-syncing by winning the Super Bowl, but publicist asked for "unflattering" photos to be pulled (

"The publicist sent an email to Buzzfeed 'respectfully asking' that they remove some of the 'unflattering' photos, specifying seven in particular as 'the worst'."

I onced queried if paparazzi snaps were a fair inverse of rife rampant magazine Photoshopping, but they asked me to pull that too. But hey, there were no were crotch level shots taken by a tiny photog with that angle to catch any Super Bowl lip-slippage amongst those "fierce" faces, so I'm cool with that.

I guess these are the not-so-fierce but rather fab thigh shots we are left with (

Christina Aguilera still trying to flog $13.5m Beverly Hills house

Christina Aguilera is still trying to flog $13.5m Beverly Hills house (, thank-you NickiTags).

"Aguilera's decided to wash her hands of the property last year just weeks after her divorce from Jordan Bratman, and a week after her arrest for public intoxication."

That is some pad! Yep, Xtina in that tub … ♥.

Here's a recap of all there is to love of that body! (

Updated 16th February.
It finally sold (
Alyssa Campanella, KIA commercial

Miss USA 2011, Alyssa Campanella got cyborgly erotic for Kia cars (

Info: Alyssa Campanella (
Lindsay Lohan not back home with mom

Lindsay Lohan swore she is not living back at home with her mom despite her financial problems (

"The troubled star was said to have been so broke that she had moved back in with her mother, and was even back in her teenage bedroom […]"

If only it were the clock's hands sliding back rather than things just comming full-circle, huh, Lindsay? Gawf all you like though, but if you've ever been there yourself when the pot is empty you are likely to stifle it.

Lindsay Lohan ginger juggs at the amfAR New York Gala

Here's those ginger-juggs at the amfAR New York Gala (

Updated 13th February.

Recent/related stories:

Jennette McCurdy Facebook titties

Jennette McCurdy continues her keenness to show she's all-grown-up now with Facebook photos (

I've been holding off posting lil' Miss McCurdy, but hey, she's 20 now and giving Facebook titties, so that's a green flag I guess. So you may as well catch this one in a tight LBD too.

Miley Cyrus cheeky again

Miley Cyrus got to showing her cheeks again ( …

And some Twitter tittie.

Recent/related stories:

Miley Cyrus gave some fitness bikini ass in Costa Rica (Pick of the Week, 4th February).
More Spring Breakers promo pics

Keep on teasing! More Spring Breakers promo pics (

Recent/related stories:

Spring Breakers trailer & more promos (Pick of the Week, 22nd January).
Nina Agdal, Aerie lingerie

Nina Agdal did something wonderful for Aerie lingerie (link dead, removed 30th May 2015) …

Candice Swanepoel, Victorias Secret

Candice Swanepoel did something tummy'tastic for Victoria's Secret (

Yes, that is a real word: I got it off Flickr.

Recent/related stories:

Candice Swanepoel, prefers Brazil, lives in a bikini! (Pick of the Week, 24th December 2012).

.:: Top column 2 ::.

Arts, tech. & funnies

Happy Valentine's play!

Happy Valentine's play! (, thank-you ClaireBear).

"CASH-strapped Brits are shunning expensive romantic nights out this Valentine's Day—and stocking up on SEX TOYS instead, a survey claims."
Asteroid to give Earth a record-setting close shave on Valentines

Giant asteroid set to give Earth a record-setting close shave on Valentine's (

"Sadly, anyone hoping to improve their chances of romance on Valentine's Day by claiming 14 February may be humankind's last hurrah, will be disappointed, says The Times. Scientists say the asteroid […] will definitely not strike the Earth."

"This may be our last night on the planet, honey, and do you really want to die without trying it up there at least once?"

Updated 16th February
Yeah, it missed us ( But did you get it up there?

Recent/related stories:

Barbara Palvin reminds Valentine's day is on the way (Pick of the Week, 28th January).
Coco Brown hopes to be first porn star in space

Adult entertainer and former Euro porn star Coco Brown aka Honey Love hopes to be first porn star in space (

But she won't be joining the 100 km-high club.

"'Trying to have sex in space is a little difficult,' she said […] 'Maybe I'll pop my boob out and take a photo of it with the Earth in the background.'"

That'll be something to distract you from trying to see the Great Wall of China!

Updated 30th May 2015.

Coco Brown in space (

Coco Brown
“She'll only be leaving beloved planet Earth for an hour but the preparation for such a journey will require a year of training [which] will take place with XCOR aerospace an American private rocket engine and spaceflight development company. Before leaving she has to work with them to get her pilots license and as well as this master the art of zero gravity.”

Born 1978 in Ohio, Coco starred in an estimated 10 to 12 films in Germany circa 1998-2003 but an advertising campaign on German late night TV sex show Wahre Liebe created quite a buzz around her, creating a rather dedicated fan following.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad wants to be first Iranian in space

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad wants to be first Iranian in space, US Senator John McCain ready to light the rocket (

Please, please, let him go! Really, really far out there!

Delacroix, "La Liberté guidant le Peuple" (Liberty leading the people)

"Unbalanced" woman vandalises famed Delacroix painting at the Louvre (

"Her motives were unclear but her scrawling of 'AE911' had some wondering if she was suffering from delusions involving the 9/11 attacks."

Was it on Liberty's tittie one must ask.

Recent/related stories:


Reclining nude sold to Russian oligarch for £1.7m was declared fake, but some scholars still disagree (

"A number of them believe the work is genuine, and they ask whether the courtroom is the best place to decide whether an artwork is authentic or not."

Where else is it's authenticity to be decided then, when the reason it ended up in court was the knowledge that most of the Russian experts are taking a backhander?

"In court papers, Christie's refers to it as 'quite probably a bread and butter picture painted to sell quickly' by a 'wheelchair-bound invalid, working hard to feed the family in a city still in the throes of the revolution.'"

Awww. If only he'd have known it would cause all this blooming fuss!

Recent/related stories:

Yoda to get own film

Disney might give Yoda his own Star Wars movie (

"… Disney, which now owns Lucasfilm, is planning to also make stand-alone movies about familiar characters, and apparently the first one is going to be about Yoda."

Hmm. To a dark place this line of thought will carry us. Great care we must take.

Recent/related stories:

Disney cancels 3D Star Wars reissues (Pick of the Week, 4th February).

Catch snaps & stories for next month’s picks daily in latest picks.

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Tags: Alyssa Campanella, Beyonce, Candice Swanepoel, Christina Aguilera, Jennette McCurdy, Miley Cyrus, Nina Agdal. Lindsay Lohan, Spring Breakers, Xtina.


Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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