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Pick of the week

Pick of the Week

8th April 2013

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Here's my grab-bag pick of last weeks best celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment sexiness, & just plain quirky stories and pictures. A weekly round-up for busy pervs! There's pictures—reading optional.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and certainly did not cause those mysterious huge bruises on LiLo’s thigh people have been searching for gossip on (but I did pull her ginger jugs out).

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This weeks stories & pics

Lindsay Lohan—loose in Brazil
Thankfully, brassieres were not much in evidence in the clothing collection LiLo was to promote on Brazilian gig.
Updated 9th April 2013.
Lindsay Lohan Brazilian boob

Oops! Lindsay Lohan’s ginger jugs almost fell out during her Brazilian gig landing in Florianópolis (

No table to hide under this time. Here’s the pics (

Lindsay Lohan Brazilian beach

LiLo’s promotional gig seemed, as far as I could see from here, to amount to turning up. I couldnt actually catch her promoting much at all. But before jetting back to the States LiLo managed to take time off from her turning up promotional gig for a photo opportunity relaxing splash at the beach (

Yeah, what is the story with those nasty bruises on her thigh? They certainly peeked interest as they’e appeared in search terms all week. Anyway, here’s plenty more of those pics (

Updated 10th April 2013.
Beach pics link changed.

Recent/related stories:

LiLo accepted rehab plea deal to dodge jail (Pick of the Week, 25th March)
Pick of the week: illustrated sexy celebrity entertainment and quirky stories
Pick of the week: illustrated sexy celebrity entertainment and quirky stories
Hayden Panettiere pink bikini

Hayden Panettiere rocked a pink bikini in Miami

Hayden Panettiere purple bikini

And then a purple one with her giant (

Recent/related stories:

Hayden Panettiere is a bikini babe in January’s Esquire (Pick of the Week, 31st December 2012)
Emily Ratajkowski, Treats outtakes

Emily Ratajkowski was naked in Treats outtakes (

Info: Emily Ratajkowski (
Emily Ratajkowski, Treats outtakes
Updated 1st July 2013.

Recent/related stories:

Emily Ratajkowski got naked for Samuel Bayer (Pick of the Week, 25th March)
Kim Kardashian tweets bare baby bump

Kim Kardashian tweeted first picture of her bare baby bump (

Kim Kardashian, eating out Sherman Oaks

Here’s Kim eating out and with her colossal milk shakers in Sherman Oaks (

Updated 10th April 2013.
Eating out Sherman Oaks pics link added.

Recent/related stories:

Aubrey O’Day burlesque booty

Aubrey O’Day gave burlesque booty (

Recent/related stories:

Aubrey O’Day pulled her pants down on Twitter (Pick of the Week, 6th November 2012)
Beyoncé new Pepsi commercial

Beyoncé’s "big news" was… a new Pepsi commercial! (

"Beyoncé teased fans when she revealed she would be making an announcement at 2.00pm on Thursday 4 April, but few could have guessed that her big news was she’s got a new Pepsi advert out!"

Well, a lot of tweeters tweet what they are having for tea as "big news" so I guess it was. Here‘s Beyoncé taking on herself in that new commercial (, which I guess is all part of being a modern-day feminist (

"But I guess I am a modern-day feminist. I do believe in equality. Why do you have to choose what type of woman you are? Why do you have to label yourself anything? I’m just a woman and I love being a woman."

Hear, hear!

Recent/related stories:

Jessica Alba, St. Barts

Jessica Alba slipped back into a bikini for a frolic in the St. Barts sea (

"The 31-year-old flaunted her perfectly toned body as she took a dip in the warm Caribbean ocean on Thursday with her husband Cash Warren."

And here’s the pics (

Recent/related stories:

Jessica Alba to dance again in Sin City sequel (Pick of the Week, 4th February)
Jessica Alba is doing that pose again (Pick of the Week, 7th January)
Jennifer Love Hewitt, STNDRD magazine

Jennifer Love Hewitt stripped to her undies for STNDRD (

Recent/related stories:

Jennifer Lawrence almost oops

Jennifer Lawrence’s titties nearly fell out on set (

Here’s those pics in HQ (

Info: Jennifer Lawrence (
Lily Aldridge, Tatler magazine

Lily Aldridge posed in a basket dress… and very little else for Tatler (

Info: Lily Aldridge (
Vanessa Hudgens, F-word--ex-music-video

Vanessa Hudgens is "proud to be a bad girl" (…

And danced around in a leopard-print mini-skirt in sneak peek of new F-word $$$ex music video (

Recent/related stories:

Kate Moss, Vogue UK

Kate Moss got her titties out for Vogue (

Recent/related stories:

Rihanna got nawty with a nude Kate Moss for V Magazine (Pick of the Week, 25th February)
Kate Moss bared her bush for Love (Pick of the Week, 28th January)
Avril Lavigne "Here’s To Never Growing Up"

Avril Lavigne posed naked for the cover of her latest single "Here’s To Never Growing Up" (

"The 28-year-old singer can be seen on the single sleeve posing in her birthday suit with nothing but a strategically placed teddy bear to protect her modesty."

But don’t get too excited though, it is for a cover after all. But for the Avril fans, here it is in HQ! (

Avril Lavigne: "Go-hard-this-weekend"

"Call up all of your friends. Go hard this weekend. For no damn reason. #HeresToNeverGrowingUp" (

Yes indeed, Avril, yes indeed.

Updated 10th May 2013.
Here’s the music video: Avril Lavigne—Here’s To Never Growing Up (

Recent/related stories:

Courtney Stodden, Girls & Corpses cover

Courtney Stodden said "no" to porn but "yes" to Girls & Corpses (

Recent/related stories:

.:: Top column 2 ::.
Cara Delevingne smitten with artist almost twice her age

Cara Delevingne smitten with artist almost twice her age (

"A source said: ‘Cara’s in New York working and fell in love with Harif’s art as his stuff is huge over there."

I concur; that won’t make "wifey" Rita Ora happy, especially after she had to share Cara with rival RiRi!

Harif Guzman
"The Venezuelan-born painter used to go by the name of his Dracula-inspired alter-ego Haculla and his most famous images show KATE MOSS’s money being nicked and supermodels’ bodies plastered with the words ‘trashed’, ‘hot’ and ‘sex’. "

Aww, heck, I just paint their titties, but hey, Cara, I’m big in Romania with agricultural ultralights!

Recent/related stories:

Joss Stone death plot duo convicted

Joss Stone death plot duo convicted (

Now that awful story dates back to 2011 but I’ve deliberately avoided it as a pick until the conviction.

Arts, tech. & funnies

Femen topless Jihad day protest

Those topless Ukrainian women’s rights activists FEMEN staged an international "Topless Jihad" day. Way hey! (

"Scores of scantily clad women grabbed attention at mosques and Tunisian embassies all over Europe on Thursday by participating in ‘Topless Jihad’ rallies to protest what they say is an Islamist crackdown on Arab women’s rights."
Info: FEMEN (
Update 9th April.
Vladimir Putin confronted by topless FEMEN protester

Bemused Vladimir Putin and Angela Merkel confronted by topless Femen protester in Hanover (
Vladimir Putin confronted by topless FEMEN protester
"The Russian president was confronted by a topless protester with an obscene slogan insulting Mr Putin painted on her back—and, he admitted, he ‘liked’ it."

You can tell! He then dashed off to wrestle a bear and spank his monkey.

Recent/related stories:

Former Ukrainian porn star Anastasia Hagen

Former Ukrainian porn star Anastasia Hagen (a.k.a. Wiska) still battling for EU asylum (

"She faces up to seven years in jail under tough new laws on pornography that came into force in 2009 … but some critics have denounced the law as too vague and open to abuse by authorities … Hagen has also received support from the Ukrainian feminist group Femen, famous for their bare-breasted protests in Ukraine and beyond."

Anastasia, who’s situation really is dire, has been battling these charges for a number of years. Several online petitions have been raised to assist but unfortunately support has been scattered between them with no official one evident. You can show your support by signing the petition below at (You can hide your name from public display by un-checking the check box above the sign button if you wish.)

Spring Breakers titles

Gentleman Scholar, titles designers for Harmony Korine’s Spring Breakers (

"The Gentleman Scholar designers were relentless in their search for ideas, eventually finding a muse in the day-glow aesthetics of their own Los Angeles surroundings."

Recent/related stories:

Carmine Infantino

Carmine Infantino, Silver Age comics pioneer, died aged 87 (

"During a five-decade career, he drew for DC, Marvel and others, and was most notable for co-creating the Silver Age version of The Flash and redesigning Batman’s look in the 1960s."

The Silver Age of comics ( defines a renaissance in American comic books, predominantly those in the superhero genre following a declined after World War II.

Anonymous hacked North Korea’s Flickr account

Hacktivists Anonymous declared war on North Korea (

Well, I guess something needed to be done after leaking that Emma Watson 50 Shades casting wish-list.

Recent/related stories:

Mozilla turned 15

Hey, Mozilla turned 15. Happy birthday! (

"The Mozilla Project launched at Netscape on March 31, 1998, to offer choice to users and drive innovation on the Web. Proudly non-profit, Mozilla makes products like Firefox with a mission to keep the power of the Web in the hands of users everywhere."

After a little wrong-footing last summer, my faith in Moz’s Firefox has returned I’m glad to say.

Recent/related stories:

Wozniak’s design for the disk drive controller is said to have been groundbreaking, but Apple had no DOS for it

The untold story behind Apple’s $13,000 operating system (

"Although he knew little about operating systems, Wozniak is confident he could have built a good one. But his co-founder couldn’t wait. ‘Steve Jobs, who didn’t have patience for a project that took more than a week, found [Shepardson Microsystems] and … they sounded eager and knowledgeable … so we hired them.’"

Contrast that with the $50,000 for which Microsoft allegedly purchased 86-DOS (although licensing it to IBM made them a fortune).

Recent/related stories:

Apple warned for making pie with U.K. Court ruling (Pick of the Week, 6th November 2012)

Catch snaps & stories for next month’s picks daily in latest picks.

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Tags: Aubrey O'Day, Avril Lavigne, Beyonce, Cara Delevingne, Courtney Stodden, Emily Ratajkowski, Hayden Panettiere, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Joss Stone, Kate Moss, Kim Kardashian, Lily Aldridge, Lindsay Lohan, Vanessa Hudgens.


Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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