Pick of the Week
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Here’s my grab-bag pick of last weeks best illustration inspiring celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment, & just plain quirky stories & picture sexiness. A weekly round-up for busy pervs. There’s pictures—reading optional.
Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely ran a mile from that!
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This weeks stories & pics
Rihanna slugged a fan with the microphone—as you do (thesun.co.uk).
“Her enraged reaction seemed to be triggered by someone who was grabbing her sleeve and refusing to let go.”
You can certainly see there’s some sleeve pulling going on but the mic/fan contact is below camera, so I’m not so sure if that was “in the face” as reported or perhaps just on the arm or shoulder.
Anyway, much more interesting was that she was up all night
using a strap-on partying with new BFF Cara Delevingne, who is planning to
lick whisk RiRi away on a boozy holiday to help
her get over difficult Brown (uk.omg.yahoo.com).
See, I did that without mentioning anything about a threesome with Rita Ora. I’m getting better see, honest.
But speaking of Rita …
Rita Ora was a sporty sight out in L.A. (egotastic.com).
“A lot of people were on her about her weight and it depressed her,” a friend said. “She went through a bad time because of the criticism.”
Well, I’m extremely bias, but I think she’s looked great whenever. Ironically though, she seemed to garner more lubricious interest with her curvier figure.
Xtina’s weight has has always been been yo-yoing and she is rumored to have suffered from an eating disorder in her teens. It‘s great to see she’ not quite saying “bye to thigh”.
Here’s the pics (gotceleb.com).
Mariah Carey, curvey bikini candids in Italy (hotcelebshome.com).
Nicki Minaj tweeted her frock bombs busting out (gistville.com).
“HELEN Flanagan was held hostage by armed raiders at her £2.8million home—hours after tweeting that she was missing her boyfriend who was away on holiday.”
Here’s the pics of Helen’s Ibiza oops (hotcelebshome.com, link updated 6th July 2013 for extra pictures).
Things were to get worse-worse for Helen who within days split up with football ace boyfriend she had been missing after spying sexts on his phone that were not to her and the realisation she’d left some nawty selfies on a phone pinched in the burglary which may turn up online (mirror.co.uk).
“The embarrassing fodder is alleged to include sexy self-taken pictures of herself posing topless, in her fancy pants and intimate texts….”
Which The Mirror is no doubt impatiently binging/googling for right now.
A pair in…
Courtney Stodden showed off her new DD’s (egotastic.com).
Farrah Abraham showed off her new non-porn titties (egotastic.com).
And a pair out.
Amanda Bynes had her implants removed (thesuperficial.com).
“I got my breast implants removed,” Bynes confirmed via email to Radar. “They were uncomfortable… I prefer them out.”
The removed implants now have a Twitter account where she can tweet “You’re ugly!” to them to her hearts content.
Oops! Doutzen Kroes gave a photoshoot nip slip (egotastic.com).
.:: Top column 2 ::.
Celebrity girl crushes (music.uk.msn.com).
“Britney Spears has given us all something to think about this week … The mum-of-two tweeted: ‘Loving your new video for #WeCantStop @MileyCyrus! Maybe you can teach me how to twerk sometime LOL.’”
So, which pairing would it be for you? Miley twerking with Brit Brit, Gwyneth Paltrow sharing her 70s bush with Beyoncé, or RiRi getting yummy with Megan Fox?
“Happy with the deal, Britney tweeted Miley back, saying: ‘@MileyCyrus That's a deal im going to hold you 2.’”
Do you want to see Britney’s bum twerking? Your Vote: Britney Spears love-hate relationship with her derriere. Love it or…?
Kirsty Heslewood crowned Miss England 2013 (him.uk.msn.com).
“Working for the title for three years, Kirsty entered Miss England to help her gain more self-confidence after suffering from selective mutism (an anxiety disorder that prevents children from speaking).”
Good on you, girl!
Arts, tech. & funnies
Topless FEMEN activists targeted Belarus president (video.uk.msn.com).
“Activists directed profanities at the president, accusing him of being the last dictator in Europe.”
“I tried to calm him down, I wasn’t looking for a fight, but he grabbed my hat, tore it off and chucked it on the pavement.”
Ouch! Pulled his helmet off!
Cheap Viagra on the way as drug patent expires (him.uk.msn.com).
“That could result in the £10-a-pill price falling through the floor, to around 85p each. It’s thought up to 20 companies are hoping to market their own versions of the drug in the coming months.”
Hadn’t it already passed it’s sell-by date with the introduction of Cialis? I guess spammers will be looking for a new niche.
Painting of the artist’s son wins BP portrait award for Susanne du Toit (guardian.co.uk).
“It is all about the hands, said artist Susanne du Toit about her striking and powerful portrait of her 35-year-old son Pieter, which last night won her one of the UK’s most prestigious visual arts prizes.”
I’m convinced female artists are obsessed with men’s hands. An artist I used to knock about with on a poetry forum was known to request pictures of guy’s hands.
Reviews are in as Adobe moves to the Creative Cloud.
Creative Cloud review (digitalartsonline.co.uk).
“Adobe has today released what under its previous approach to upgrades would have been called CS7…. But as the company has moved to a largely-subscription-only model—bundling in online services for online typography and portfolio hosting, alongside its core desktop applications…”
“Say goodbye to physical media and Photoshop CS6, and hello to a Creative Cloud subscription and Photoshop CC.”
It mentioned everybody else, but where is the “digital painter?” The irony of the matter is that although most seem to turn there nose up at PS as a digital painting tool in preference to more dedicated painting software, the majority of tutorials you will see both online and in print are usually for PS, or require you to go into PS or an equivalent such as GIMP at some point to do what the dedicated painter can’t. I truly think it’s the “photo” in the name that makes digital painters wish they were using something else, causing the digital painter to be ignored in such reviews.
But anyway…. The subscription model has certainly come in for some early flack.
“Everyone I spoke to at Adobe so far has been very polite and rather delightful. Fucking incompetent, but delightful”
Labour politician “fathered a child with an alien” (news.uk.msn.com).
“The known extra-terrestrial enthusiast said his intergalactic relations are with an alien being he calls ‘the Cat Queen’, and together they have fathered a child called Zarka.”
She’s stuck her claws in though:
“[The] married father-of-three who sits on Whitby Town Council, said his wife was ‘very unhappy’ with the revelation.”
No shit, Sherlock!
“The 10-ins tall statuette of a man called Neb-Senu, which dates back to 1800 BC, mysteriously spins 180 degrees with nobody going near it.”
Catch snaps & stories for next month’s picks daily in latest picks.
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Tags: Amanda Bynes, Brooke Burke, Christina Aguilera, Courtney Stodden, Doutzen Kroes, Farrah Abraham, Helen Flanagan, Kate Upton, Mariah Carey, Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, Rita Ora.
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