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Whatever’s on my mind really.

A peek at illustration inspiring celebrity sexiness, quirky news stories from inherently pornified pop culture, tips, sketchbook and work in progress, reviews and other things of interest; whatever’s on my mind really—which more fool you if you ever take that seriously.

Latest Picks is a sort of mini-blog for daily thoughts and picks. Longer articles, stories & sketches are found in the full-size blog, where indeed Latest Picks are moved when updates to a story make it too large.

Note: Both Latest Picks and Blog are to be retired at the end of September, although both will remain available indefinitely as an archived part of the site. No further updates to past stories will be made.

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7th August 2020

Bungled NHS contact tracing app ‘WILL be launched’ this MONTH—but scaled back programme will only give details of local infections after ministers admit it cannot do the task it was designed for (

A photograph of a T-shirt with a “6 Stages of Debugging” caption and a flowchart diagram on a hanger above desk with two monitor screens behind
The smartphone app was intended to keep track of who people have been in contact with in case one of them becomes infected with the virus.

With BoJo’s “world beating” track and trace system originally scheduled for May.

In Britain an app was for months hailed as a crucial to stamping out the coronavirus in the population, but it soon become clear the plan wouldn't work when officials realised their app didn't work on iPhones.

But not only missing “a staggering 96 per cent of iPhones in the Isle of Wight trial” but 25 per cent of until recently un-sugar taxed dessert named ’droids too. Seemingly suggesting that any of the variations on the humorous six stages of debugging were only indulged at the latest stage possible and was likely ported from something mustered by a chap in corduroys with an old copy of VB6 running on one of those Windows XP systems the NHS was caught ransomware short a few years back.

And seemingly when devices could be coaxed to participate, those tasked with ringing anyone tracked did little better:

It came as the boss of outsourcing giant Serco has defended the fact that 10,000 contact tracers have only spoken to an average of 2.4 people each.

The outsourced contract reportedly worth up to £108m and one anonymous contact tracer saying she is effectively being “paid to watch Netflix”.

Updated 11th August 2020

NHS Test and Trace cuts 6,000 contact tracers as troubled scheme scaled back (

A third of NHS contact tracers will be laid off within weeks with remaining call handlers redeployed to local authorities amid ongoing difficulties for Boris Johnson's "world beating" scheme.

With those redeployed having to continue their homeworking Netflix binging as part of local test and trace teams.

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Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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