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Whatever’s on my mind really.

A peek at illustration inspiring celebrity sexiness, quirky news stories from inherently pornified pop culture, tips, sketchbook and work in progress, reviews and other things of interest; whatever’s on my mind really—which more fool you if you ever take that seriously.

Latest Picks is a sort of mini-blog for daily thoughts and picks. Longer articles, stories & sketches are found in the full-size blog, where indeed Latest Picks are moved when updates to a story make it too large.

Note: Both Latest Picks and Blog are to be retired at the end of September, although both will remain available indefinitely as an archived part of the site. No further updates to past stories will be made.

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20th April 2017
Victorian-era ivory dildo, picture: Matthews Auction Room
Victorian-era ivory dildo, picture: Matthews Auction Room
Antiques Roadshow

Victorian-era ivory dildo you’ve been waiting for finally up for auction? (metro.co.uk).

What “you’ve been waiting for”; indeed, possibly fems and likely some curious Tims invariably in tights in ManOChat chatroom letting all know where a non-Victorian one is currently stuck.

“Yes, at Matthews Auctioneers in Oldcastle, Ireland, the lifelike-looking phallus (which has been intricately carved from ivory) is up for sale. Where does it sit in the auction brochure? Literally between a pair of antique miniature portraits and a set of decanter labels. OK. According to the Irish Times, the large sex toy is displayed in a scarlet lined box.”

That could have raised a few full eyebrows had it turned up carried by Curious Tim’s “fem” fem-friend with identical mannerisms “bend-me over” Stephanie while they wait to find out its monetary as well as practical worth on Antiques Roadshow.

“And it’s described as an ‘antique carved ivory ladies companion in scarlet lined leather upholstered carry box with inset bevelled glass panel’… Fancy. … ‘…the original owner, was in India in the 1840s, where he shot himself an elephant, and brought the tusk home.’ It is believed that the sex toy was later carved in China between 1899 and 1901.”

For his wife I assume for when he was on more extended colonial animal trophy capturing excursions with chaps in rugged manly chaps, but who knows.

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Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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