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21st April 2016

London gets its first naked restaurant, waiting list already at 5,000 (

Roman dining habits?
“I don’t know about you, but if there’s one thing that’s always bugged me about eating in restaurants it’s having to wear clothes. Why stain them, when you can imbibe as the Romans might, naked, with sauce and wine spilling all down your body?”

Well, each to their own, and I’m as much keen to view nudity as the rest—if not more, and I certainly don’t feel the need to “slut shame” those of reality TV and its ilk as some quizzically do while they voluntarily look—but food and nudity have never really flicked my switch—alright, besides the porn staple of “large vegetable insertion”—and, indeed, I must profess, myself, I do not like to be studied eating regardless of clothing, which lack of may very well cause all the more attention, but not from me, who certainly does not feel any lewd desire from idea of seeing a glutton ecstatically fill second stomach with said “sauce and wine spilling all down your body” ala nude variation of certain scene in Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life, (Part VI—The Autumn Years). But yeah, each to their own, and there is a niche, but perhaps intrinsically linked with orientalism erotica involving scooping raw fish off as dish-serving naked flesh, but a gap not yet filled with cucumber or squash there is:

“This is presumably the gap in the market The Bunyadi is hoping to fill, a pop-up restaurant coming to London this summer for three months. ‘Enter a secret Pangea-like world,’ its website promises, ‘free from phones, electric lights and even clothing (optional) and revisit the beginning where everything was fresh, free and unadulterated from the trappings of modern life.’’”

Seemingly the same “gap” as nudist clubs and beaches then, where the nudity is pure pantheistic getting back to nature (sans disease, catching your own food, sanitation and health and hygiene worries) and where erections caused by said nudity are passé, children are allowed to walk about in front of elderly strangers in a manner that would draw extreme concern in other environs and its nothing at all about sex, regardless of what certain chaps get up to on certain south east coast clothes free beaches: Man on naked bike ride got ejected after erected (Pick of the Week 15th Jun. 2015).

So, is it for celebration of the getting back to nature cause of naturism or just a gimmick moving inevitably on from every other type of themed bar and restaurant for a bucket-listed social media posted and listed world which will fall flat from lack of selfie oppo when free from clothing, but also camera phones and electric lights?

“The pop-up—which at the time of writing has a waiting list of 4,526—is the brainchild of Lollipop, who were behind the similarly lucrative Breaking Bad-themed cocktail bar. ‘The idea is to experience true liberation,’ founder Seb Lyall told the IBTimes.”

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Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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