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Pick of the week

Pick of the Week

24th October 2013

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Here’s my grab-bag pick of last weeks best illustration inspiring celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment, & just plain quirky stories & picture sexiness. A weekly round-up for busy pervs. There’s pictures—reading optional.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and likely groaned home.

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Last weeks best stories & pics

Kim Kardashian Instagramed her ass

All hell broke loose when Kim Kardashian Instagramed her ass (

“Kim Kardashian you are a MOTHER now I don’t think posting pictures of your ass on Instagram is appropriate”

Old Mrs MacSporran in Tobermory concurred: “After dropping a wee spud a woman should limit herself to copious tarten and sackcloth.”

The attention side of thing was not reserved for those just willing to tell her off, soon spawning an ass selfie trend.

Anastasia Ashley surfing up her own spin on Kim Kardashian’s rear selfie

Tidal talent Anastasia Ashley surfed up her own spin (

The Daily Mail promised to keep all informed in headline fashion on this developing disgustingly lewd trend.

Kim Kardashian Instagramed her ass

Here’s Kim’s ass selfie a little larger for further pursed lip investgation (

Recent/related stories:


Thai police clean house with Rihanna’s tweets (

“… authorities busted a bar owner for allegedly running a lewd sex show after Rihanna tweeted about the act.”

The primate, a slow loris who’s Instagram photo instigated the first arrests (, was not available for comment on the scene which RiRi described:

“Either I was phuck wasted last night, or I saw a Thai woman pull a live bird, 2 turtles, razors, shoot darts and ping pong, all out of her p***y.”

Belgian Maurice, who had accepted a booking the previous night, was also unavailable for comment.

Recent/related stories:

RiRi’s certainly not quitting giving it some tongue! (Pick of the Week, 19th September)
Nicki Minaj boob Instagrams

Nicki Minaj Instagrammed these!

Recent/related stories:

Nicki Minaj tweeted a tittie selfie (Pick of the Week, 15th August)
Nicki Minaj twerked in the pool (Pick of the Week, 22nd July)
Iggy Azalea, Change Your Life video

Iggy Azalea got her norks out for Showgirls-inspired “Change Your Life” video (

“Speaking about the reason behind the theme of the music video, Iggy said: ‘I’m obsessed with bulb lights at the moment. On tour we have carousel lighting and I love the old Vegas lights, showgirl lights and that’s what [the video is] built on.”

A unique, possibly life-changing twist on that might have been if she’d had one blinking on and off up her fanny. Sadly no, and despite the suggestively censored piccies by the Daily Mail, uncensored, her nipplage, alas, was still hidden by tiny pasties (

Iggy Azalea, London cab oops

Fortunatly enough, an oops in the back of London cab made up for that.

Recent/related stories:

Iggy Azalea sexed up her routine at Radio 1Xtra Live (Pick of the Week, 17th October)
Helen Flanagan, 2014 calendar

Helen Flanagan took it all off for her 2014 calendar (

Recent/related stories:

Helen Flanagan gave bikini candids in the Maldives (Pick of the Week, 17th October)
Helen Flanagan got topless for The Sun (Pick of the Week, 19th September)
Joanna Krupa, Mojave Desert

Joanna Krupa got topless in the Mojave Desert (

Recent/related stories:

Joanna Krupa gave candid tittie (Pick of the Week, 15th August)
Joanna Krupa went topless poolside in Miami (Pick of the Week, 3rd July)
Nina Agdal, Martha Rey Swimwear

Nina Agdal gave La Boheme cheek for Martha Rey Swimwear (

Recent/related stories:

Nina Agdal got topless for Euroman (Pick of the Week, 30th July)
Nina Agdal butt-naked Esquire photoshoot (Pick of the Week, 21st May)
Candice Swanepoel, Victoria’s Secret $10 million Fantasy Bra

Candice Swanepoel’s boobies gave income support to Victoria’s Secret $10 million Fantasy Bra (

“I’ve never worn anything this pricey, and we have to put gloves on when we put it on, Swanepoel shares. It’s kind of a big ordeal. The bra comes with two bodyguards and we have to handle it with a lot of care!”

Oh, I‘m sure their hands are ready to provide constant protection.

Candice Swanepoel, Victoria’s Secret $10 million Fantasy Bra

You can catch more pics and a video clip here (

Recent/related stories:

.:: Top column 2 ::.
Kim Kardashian—Halloween pumpkin pleaser
If an ass selfie can trigger such indignation, one can only imagine the demonic vitriol reserved for Kim Kardashian’s pumpkin pleasing!
E.T. porn parody

E.T. got a porn parody! (

“…and look, he has three-testicles. We should call him E.T.—extra testicle.”

Recent/related stories:

Fifty Shades of Grey porn rip-off spurs legal action (Pick of the Week, 3rd December 2012)

Arts, culture, tech. & funnies

“Sexy Squid” costume

Sexy Squid? Halloween costumes get absurd (

“The definition of what constitutes a ‘sexy’ Halloween costume has been quickly expanding in the past few years….”

I’m sure there is some out there with deep tentacle erotica lustings have no complaints!

Have you an absurd costume for Halloween? Feel free to post a picture in the members area.

Recent/related stories:

Majority of Halloween costume spending is for adults (Pick of the Week, 17th October)
Banksy, New York spray art stall

Banksy set up a anonymous spray art sale in New York filmed by hidden camera (

“A man from Chicago may have wandered into a small fortune after buying four paintings by Banksy for just $240 (£150) from an unmarked stall set up by the street artist in New York’s Central Park.”

The first sale didn’t occur until 3:30 p.m. The point Banksy seems to be attempting to make here is that art seems to only be of value if the artist is famous.

A woman poses for a photograph in front of artwork by Jeff Koons

This is likely just a part of human nature, but The Guardian’s Giles Fraser contemplates why why domesticated iconoclasm has made contemporary art vulnerable to a takeover bid from the money men (

“Contemporary art has become the purest expression of modern capitalism, embodying that irritating amoral dictum: something is worth what someone is prepared to pay for it.”

Many people people do believe art should be free, but many also paradoxically believe the creator of a work is only worth accrediting if its value reflects on or profits them.

Maurice, especially distressed by the appearance of Miley’s tongue so near his pink private parts

Take Maurice, for example, who is known to charge poor unknown artists as being “little Hitlers” when hotlinking is prevented of portraits of Uncle Joe for his Marxist-Leninist backing-dancer manifesto (on which please remember to click the ads and feel free to donate).

Back at the start of his moonthlong New York scrawl, the Guardian’s Jonathan Jones was not impressed at all (Pick of the Week 9th October), but Will Ellsworth-Jones, author of a biography of Banksy, aims to show why his critics have got it wrong (

Banksy in New York pictures
“Above all both graffiti writers and critics are united in finding him guilty of one unforgivable crime: he is just too popular.”

Recent/related stories:

Mein Agnes, Albrect Dürer’s portrait of his wife

Rare Albrecht Dürer works go on display in London (

“A new exhibition at the Courtauld Gallery in London aims to show this extraordinary process of self-invention and sheer hard graft through rare drawings and prints, many of them never seen before in Britain.”

Steve Jobs thought he was a Second World War fighter pilot in a previous life, ex-girlfriend and mother of his first child claims (

“They had ‘incredible’ sex but he was a control freak, extremely insulting and had a ‘vicious’ ego—personal characteristics that foreshadowed his later reputation at Apple as a controlling boss and stickler for details.”


Recent/related stories:

Ransomware demands $300 in Bitcoins to release your data

Ransomware demands $300 in Bitcoins to release your data (

“CryptoLocker gives infected users 72 hours to pay the ransom, and according to some users, the hackers behind CryptoLocker have been keeping their word and decrypting the computers of those who shell out $300 via a MoneyPak card or 2 Bitcoins….”
Updated 27th August 2014.
“Victims need to provide an email address and upload just one of the encrypted files from their computer, and the service will email a link that victims can use to download a recovery program to decrypt all of their scrambled files.”
Updated 8th June 2014.
“According to McAfee, the seizure of Gameover is expected to coincide with a cleanup effort in which Internet service providers contact affected customers to help remediate compromised PCs.”

Again though, remember there is a particular old scam where telephone “help” at [insert] informs someone their system is infected and that they need to vist a site and download software to remove it ( Needless to say, they will certainly have something after.

Updated 30th November 2013.
“…the crooks behind this malware campaign launched a ‘customer service’ feature that they have been promising to debut for weeks….”

Recent/related stories:

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Tags: Candice Swanepoel, Helen Flanagan, Iggy Azalea, Joanna Krupa, Kim Kardashian, Nicki Minaj, Nina Agdal, Rihanna.


Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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